Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Self Revelation

well, i'm not sure if anyone will even see this post. it has been so long since i've even thought about posting anything new, and i'm quite sure that anyone who's read it (before i stopped updating... if there was, in fact, anyone at all) has completely lost interest by now. but, regardless if anyone reads this or not, i am going to start charting my progress here again. it is a good way for me to see if i am improving at all and maybe even get some tips and pointers from anyone out there.

i took some time off to have a baby, and in the meantime, i finally acquired my Nikon D300. it is not brand new, used off of Amazon, but i got a killer deal on it. i got myself a couple of super fun lenses (also off Amazon); nikon 35mm 1.8 and a nice little telephoto 55-200 (also a nikon), some awesome books by Bryan Peterson (again, thank you Amazon), and some other odds and ends like my CF card and some super crazy fast card readermabobby.

it has been so fun learning how to use the d300. it is way over my head and i know it is not even that advanced of a camera in camera world. i do think it is ranked however, near the top of the amateur scene and maybe, if i'm lucky, right after they came out a few years back, it might have even been ranked on the lower part of the professional scene.

i got it in december, just a couple of weeks before i had my precious baby girl. i have taken exactly 1,078 pictures since then. and out of those 1,078, i would say maybe 5 of them are worth while. i do feel like i have improved a little in the last two months though. i have only used the program settings for maybe 3 shots, and that was just to compare between that and my manual settings. so i do feel like i have moved a little bit in the right direction.

i still have so so so much to learn but i have been loving every single second of it. i feel so happy when i am behind that lens. i have come across some really great websites that i refer to as often as i can, plus the books that i mentioned earlier have all been such a great source of learning for me. i continue to stock jeansmiths blog (there is no end to her incredibleness) and i even pestered her into explaining natural light photography to me! so i feel like i am on a good path to learning all i can. now if i could just find the time to sit down and study and click away to my little hearts content, i may have photography mastered in about 13 years or so!

there is just so much to photography to figure out and it is a little overwhelming to me at times. but i truly love it so much. i love it as an art form, a means of expression, an outlet, an escape. i love that a single capture can express an entire lifetime of emotion. i have loved photography from the very moment i took my first picture on a real camera way back in high school. and i have and have always had one hundred excuses why NOT to take photographs for a living. but in a moment of self revelation, i finally admitted to myself, by pure accident, that i want to be a photographer when i grow up. i really really do. no more excuses. there is no reason i can't become what i have dreamed about for so long.

i haven't worked out all the details yet. like how am i going to balance learning all there is to learn and keep up as a mommy of 3 ? when do i find time to practice, to learn photography, my camera, photoshop? well, the answer is...i have no idea. all i know is that i want to do this. my husband is so supportive. he gives me strength and confidence that this dream of mine can become a reality. i put no time frame on myself. it might be 10 years before i can consider myself ready to charge people even a minimum fee. it may only take me 6 months...who knows? with my children and husband coming first, there is really no way to gauge. all i know at this point is that this. is. happening. i am going to do it. fear, move aside. i am going to become a professional photographer. maybe not tomorrow. maybe not next year. but sometime in my life i will be the kind of photographer i dream about being. i am going to be learning all i can- when ever i can. here i come. it is going to be awesome!

so here i go. i am off to discover all i can about this fascinating world of photography, but first, i just have to clean up the entire box of goldfish crackers that the kids just dumped out all over my living room floor.

i will leave you now with a handful of shots that i've gotten with my new camera that are semi-decent...i know they are a far cry from professionalism...but it's a start...

...and i know it is a bit of a picture overload. you're just lucky i didn't upload all 1,078 pictures!...







this one has some distracting background action going on...k- i know this has a lot of distracting background too... and that darn sippy cup... but come on, are you serious with those baby blues!

shadowy...
buggary...
but at least i got a little bokeh workin' it for me on these last two.

4 comments:

Shiree said...

GO, ASH! I am proud of you for going for your dream. It is so ridiculous the things that keep us from just doing what makes us truly happy. I am in the process of deciding what my dream actually is, but you can bet I'll do it! Keep it up.

Grand Pooba said...

Ash! Welcome back! How exciting to get a new camera, I love my nikon! And that lens you got rocks!!! Your pictures are amazing. You really know what you're doing. I can't wait to see more!

jsfeatherstone said...

Oh my word, Ashley, I LOVE these pictures.Lake is SO gorgeous. You do such a great job at capturing these darling kiddos. I cannot believe Kai is in preschool. They grow up too fast. I cannot believe your kids' blue eyes and how gorgeous they are. I laughed so hard on your blog post about Ben's girlfriend in the background on your vacation!

Irene said...

Asha, I didn't know that you had another baby. That explains why you have been absent from the blogging world. Congratulations! She's beautiful. And, I also stock Jean Smiths photography. She is Matt's best friends sister. I LOVE her work. So clean and just beautiful!!